不想过了，该怎么办
- 主题发起人 dancingduck
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今天太忙，少说几句。
1. 楼主与公婆之间的关系，处得好是缘份，处得一般是本份，很难改变也无法强求。在明知难以处好的情况下非要在一个屋檐下长期生活，必定造成下一步的问题，所以分开住是好主意，关键是怎么分比较合适。窃以为在老人刚来的时候，先和他们一起住，帮助他们熟悉这里的环境和生活方式，再分开。给他们在你家附近单卖个小房子是个很好的选择，你老公和公婆都应该更容易接受。
2. 楼主与老公的关系，始终是这个连环套里的核心。解决矛盾的钥匙，掌握在老公手里。他要是能想明白自己小家庭和大家庭之间的关系，更理解和尊重妻子的感受，处理问题更艺术一点，这个家庭的持续和睦是没有多大问题的。
3. 劝楼主不要老往“不过了”的方向上想。因为跟父母的矛盾而离婚的，朋友中也见过，对大家都是伤害。据说离婚对人的伤害，仅次于死亡。与其半死，还不如想想别的解决办法，排遣郁闷的方法多呢，是不是？你家的情况根本没那么糟糕，何必呢？
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另外，楼上关于房产分割的讨论，感觉好像有一些误解。查了一下，法律上对于婚内共同住房，即Matrimonial Home （which means where married spouses ordinarily reside together), 有其特殊的规定。关心的可以读一下下文。
http://www.nelligan.ca/e/thematrimonialhomelittleknownfacts.cfm
No Deduction for Equity in Matrimonial Home in Calculation of Division of Matrimonial Assets
In the normal course, when married spouses separate, in order to determine the appropriate division of assets on marriage breakdown we would calculate the net value of each parties' assets that they came into the marriage with (all assets minus all debts on the date of marriage). We would then calculate for each spouse their respective net assets owned on the date of separation (all assets minus all debts on the date of separation), in order to determine each spouse's net increase of wealth during the marriage. The spouse who has the higher net increase would have to make a payment to the other spouse of 1/2 the difference between their respective net increases in wealth accumulated over the marriage. The Ontario Family Law Act creates an exception for the matrimonial home however.
Notwithstanding that one spouse may have owned the matrimonial home on the date of marriage in sole tenancy, and brought that asset into the marriage, he or she does not get to include the value of that asset as something he or she owned on the date of marriage. The full value of the home at the time of separation is included in his or her calculation of net assets on the date of separation. Simply put, you do not get a financial credit on marriage breakdown for having brought the matrimonial home into the marriage.
It must be noted that for this exception to apply, the same home must still be the matrimonial home at the time of separation. If the original home was sold and a new home moved into and was the matrimonial home at the time of separation the spouse who brought the original home into the marriage would be allowed to include the value of the original matrimonial home in calculating his or her assets owned on the date of marriage. As a corollary to this, in the normal course, any money or money's worth that was gifted to a spouse from a third party (say parents or an inheritance from that rich uncle who lives in Europe) is excluded from the calculation of a spouse's net assets owned on the date of separation. However, if that inherited or gifted money is put into the matrimonial home, i.e to pay down the mortgage, build a pool or renovate, the exclusion is lost.
These types of issues can have a very large impact on a spouse's financial situation at the time of separation. If you are contemplating marriage and already own a home, you should consider getting some legal advice on this issue to determine whether you wish to take some steps to protect the value of that asset in the event of a marriage breakdown.
1. 楼主与公婆之间的关系，处得好是缘份，处得一般是本份，很难改变也无法强求。在明知难以处好的情况下非要在一个屋檐下长期生活，必定造成下一步的问题，所以分开住是好主意，关键是怎么分比较合适。窃以为在老人刚来的时候，先和他们一起住，帮助他们熟悉这里的环境和生活方式，再分开。给他们在你家附近单卖个小房子是个很好的选择，你老公和公婆都应该更容易接受。
2. 楼主与老公的关系，始终是这个连环套里的核心。解决矛盾的钥匙，掌握在老公手里。他要是能想明白自己小家庭和大家庭之间的关系，更理解和尊重妻子的感受，处理问题更艺术一点，这个家庭的持续和睦是没有多大问题的。
3. 劝楼主不要老往“不过了”的方向上想。因为跟父母的矛盾而离婚的，朋友中也见过，对大家都是伤害。据说离婚对人的伤害，仅次于死亡。与其半死，还不如想想别的解决办法，排遣郁闷的方法多呢，是不是？你家的情况根本没那么糟糕，何必呢？
-------
另外，楼上关于房产分割的讨论，感觉好像有一些误解。查了一下，法律上对于婚内共同住房，即Matrimonial Home （which means where married spouses ordinarily reside together), 有其特殊的规定。关心的可以读一下下文。
http://www.nelligan.ca/e/thematrimonialhomelittleknownfacts.cfm
No Deduction for Equity in Matrimonial Home in Calculation of Division of Matrimonial Assets
In the normal course, when married spouses separate, in order to determine the appropriate division of assets on marriage breakdown we would calculate the net value of each parties' assets that they came into the marriage with (all assets minus all debts on the date of marriage). We would then calculate for each spouse their respective net assets owned on the date of separation (all assets minus all debts on the date of separation), in order to determine each spouse's net increase of wealth during the marriage. The spouse who has the higher net increase would have to make a payment to the other spouse of 1/2 the difference between their respective net increases in wealth accumulated over the marriage. The Ontario Family Law Act creates an exception for the matrimonial home however.
Notwithstanding that one spouse may have owned the matrimonial home on the date of marriage in sole tenancy, and brought that asset into the marriage, he or she does not get to include the value of that asset as something he or she owned on the date of marriage. The full value of the home at the time of separation is included in his or her calculation of net assets on the date of separation. Simply put, you do not get a financial credit on marriage breakdown for having brought the matrimonial home into the marriage.
It must be noted that for this exception to apply, the same home must still be the matrimonial home at the time of separation. If the original home was sold and a new home moved into and was the matrimonial home at the time of separation the spouse who brought the original home into the marriage would be allowed to include the value of the original matrimonial home in calculating his or her assets owned on the date of marriage. As a corollary to this, in the normal course, any money or money's worth that was gifted to a spouse from a third party (say parents or an inheritance from that rich uncle who lives in Europe) is excluded from the calculation of a spouse's net assets owned on the date of separation. However, if that inherited or gifted money is put into the matrimonial home, i.e to pay down the mortgage, build a pool or renovate, the exclusion is lost.
These types of issues can have a very large impact on a spouse's financial situation at the time of separation. If you are contemplating marriage and already own a home, you should consider getting some legal advice on this issue to determine whether you wish to take some steps to protect the value of that asset in the event of a marriage breakdown.
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我咋觉得说的是我家呢？
气归气，吵也吵过闹也闹过，人家还是一如继往，连她儿子都拿她一点办法没有。。。能怎么办呢？真的赶出去租房吗？我做不出来，我现在的结论是，此题真的无解。也只能算了，将就吧。。。两个老人不会英语单独出去生活我们也不放心，出个门要是摔了也麻烦呀。再说话说回来了，要是我父母来，我也不愿意让他们出去租房，太孤单了。
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何叔，讲清楚好务啦？ 是想接着老人还是楼主这样的小媳妇？谁家有老人的不愿意一块住的，可以考虑住我家来！
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老何此言差yi。你的情况是可能是你娘善良好相处，或者你老何疼媳妇，或者你魅力大能震住LP。如果哪中情况都不是，很多人情愿自己累点也不要老人帮忙。我就有知道的人老人走了后虽然累点但愉快多了。谁家有老人的不愿意一块住的，可以考虑住我家来！
俺现在两个人带一6岁小娃，一下班就得赶紧走，接孩子回家，冷锅冷灶；
一大早起来就什么都得做准备这把孩子往学校轰。 周末更是东奔西颠满城跑。
想想，前几年俺娘在这，可幸福了
不打诳语不瞎说： 俺娘就是个大字不识的农民，但俺媳妇觉得俺娘比她当教授的娘还要好
别说工婆，就是自己的亲爹妈都得权衡下。
你说的这算啥，我也是２娃２人都工作LD还是contract忙的哪有时间来CFC发帖还经常加班，没老人帮忙不一样过的好好的。
村长说得对，这世界谁离开了谁照转。关键还是当事人的心态。所以说人不可太贪心，要么自己能吃苦独立坚强点不要靠别人，要想靠别人了舒服点就得学会适当低头，２头只能占一个，看怎么取舍了。
不过我相信老何肯定是个疼媳妇的好男人，要不咋那么多夫人呢？
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