老闲和西迈的“憋死村长”让俺想起这个笑话:
On Sunday, the preacher awoke, called his deacon, and said, "I'm terribly sick today, and will not be able to offer service."
"Well, we surely hope you are feeling better soon," said the deacon. "What matters most is that your health is blessed, and we shall all pray for you today."
The preacher opened a box from under the bed that had a new folded golf shirt, his cleaned and polished golf shoes, and he put them on instead of his usual clothes.
Later, on the beautiful practice green, the preacher fit right in but couldn't help feeling conspicuous. At that exact moment up in Heaven, Saint Peter was looking down. He said to God, "Do you see what is happening down there? I'm very disappointed in this preacher. Surely you are going to do something?"
God replied, "Don't worry Pete, I've got it all figured out."
St. Pete knew it was best not to question any further, but to just wait patiently and watch for it all to play out. He watched the preacher walk confidently to the first tee, a short par-4. The preacher teed it up, and hit a pretty fair drive, low and straight.
But just then, God waved his hand and created the perfect little wind. The wind carried the ball as if in the hand of God and lifted it down the fairway. The ball took once bounce and landed on the green, kept rolling, swung to the right, barely crept up to the hole, and fell in. It was beautiful.
Up in heaven, St. Pete was very upset. "An albatross! Are you kidding me? ere is one of our own preachers committing this sin, on a Sunday no less. Just when I'm certain that you are going to offer up the perfect punishment to befit the sin, you instead go and reward him with a once-in-a-lifetime shot?"
God says, "Yes, but calm down Pete. Who is he going to tell?"
On Sunday, the preacher awoke, called his deacon, and said, "I'm terribly sick today, and will not be able to offer service."
"Well, we surely hope you are feeling better soon," said the deacon. "What matters most is that your health is blessed, and we shall all pray for you today."
The preacher opened a box from under the bed that had a new folded golf shirt, his cleaned and polished golf shoes, and he put them on instead of his usual clothes.
Later, on the beautiful practice green, the preacher fit right in but couldn't help feeling conspicuous. At that exact moment up in Heaven, Saint Peter was looking down. He said to God, "Do you see what is happening down there? I'm very disappointed in this preacher. Surely you are going to do something?"
God replied, "Don't worry Pete, I've got it all figured out."
St. Pete knew it was best not to question any further, but to just wait patiently and watch for it all to play out. He watched the preacher walk confidently to the first tee, a short par-4. The preacher teed it up, and hit a pretty fair drive, low and straight.
But just then, God waved his hand and created the perfect little wind. The wind carried the ball as if in the hand of God and lifted it down the fairway. The ball took once bounce and landed on the green, kept rolling, swung to the right, barely crept up to the hole, and fell in. It was beautiful.
Up in heaven, St. Pete was very upset. "An albatross! Are you kidding me? ere is one of our own preachers committing this sin, on a Sunday no less. Just when I'm certain that you are going to offer up the perfect punishment to befit the sin, you instead go and reward him with a once-in-a-lifetime shot?"
God says, "Yes, but calm down Pete. Who is he going to tell?"