Answers from the children

人淡如菊

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The following are different answers given by school-age children to the
given questions:

Why did God make mothers?

1.-She is the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.

2.-Think about it, it was the best way to get more people.

3.-Mostly to clean the house.

4.-To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

1.- He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.

2.- Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.

3.- God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger
parts.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?

1.- We are related.

2.- God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

1- God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice
in the world and one dab of mean.

2.-They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use
string. I think.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

1.- My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.

2.- I do not know because I was not there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.

3.- They say she used to be nice.

How did your mom meet your dad?

1.- Mom was working in a store and dad was shoplifting.

What did mom need to know about your dad before she married him?

1.- His last name.

2.- She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get
drunk on beer? Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores.

Why did your mom marry your dad?

1.- My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.

2.- She got too old to do anything else with him.

3.- My grandma says that mom did not have her thinking cap on.

What makes a real woman?

1.- It means you have to be really bossy without looking bossy.

Who is the boss at your house?

1.- Mom does not want to be boss, but she has to because dad is such a
goofball.

2.- Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.

3.- I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What is the difference between moms and dads?

1.- Moms work at work and work at home, and dads just got to work at work.

2.- Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.

3.- Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power
because that is who you gotta ask if you want to sleep over at your
friend's.

What does your mom do in her spare time?

1.- Mothers do not do spare time.

2.- To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What is the difference between moms and grandmas?

1.- About 30 years.

2.- You can always count on grandmothers for candy. Sometimes moms do
not even have bread on them!

Describe the world's greatest mom?

1.- She would make broccoli taste like ice cream!

2.- The greatest mom in the world would not make me kiss my fat aunts!

3.- She would always be smiling and keep her opinions to herself.

Is anything about your mom perfect?

1.- Her teeth are perfect, but she bought them from the dentist.

2.- Her casserole recipes. But we hate them.

3.- Just her children.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

1.- On the inside she is already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.

2.- Diet. You know, her hair. I would dye it, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

1.-She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I would get rid of that.

2.- I would make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister
who did it and not me.
 
Very amusing. :lol:
 
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