The diary of a homeless man
- 主题发起人 山阳手
- 开始时间
- 注册
- 2011-06-13
- 消息
- 171
- 荣誉分数
- 30
- 声望点数
- 0
"You chicken out? No worries. They wouldn't fight you."
The party was apparently having a great time. Although they were speaking some Asian language, from their laughters, I could tell they had lots of fun. In the mean while, Hand, Prada and Grace, each took a pen and started writing on a piece of napkin. That was part of the process. I, on the other hand, kept enjoying my wine.
The party ordered their food and booze. As they were eating and after some alcohol, they got a bit hyper and their voices got louder and louder. The sweater guy was the most talkative. His face got all red, apparently a cheap drinker. Sometimes, he would stand up to talk as if that was the only way to make himself heard.
After they had their food and just ordered their desserts. Hand said to me, "Let the show begin!"
I walked up to the table, wearing an angry look, and knocked on their table real hard. --Three times!
"Can't you guys lower your fxxking voice !?" I said loudly, staring at the sweater guy, then Yong Bao, then quickly the Kungfu master, and then the sweater guy again.
I must look really angry and scary. They all shut up, shocked, perhaps partly because of my voice and language and partly because of my mohawk and piercings.
The party all of sudden went dead silent.
Before any of them was able to respond, I added, "If I don't come up to make it fxxking clear, you motherfxxkers just wouldn't get it, would ya?"
I stood there, waiting for their response. They were all looking at me, speechless.
After one, two, three, four seconds, the Kungfu master started, "We are … solly... vely vely solly... We will lower our voices." He said nicely and politely, with that funny accent. That put me at ease. Whoo!
The sweater guy stood up and said to me, "Yes, sorry, we are very sorry. We will keep our voice low."
I turned my back without acknowledging them, and went back to my seat.
"How did I do?" I asked the gang.
"Good job, good job!" they all said, cheerfully. They passed me their napkins. "Read these!" Hand said. And they each got another napkin and started writing again.
The other table indeed became much quieter. In fact, instead of speaking, they were nearly whispering. But since they were so close to us, we could still hear their voices.
"Here you go. " Hand passed me another napkin. "This is what the sweater guy just said. And, buddy, round two!"
The party was apparently having a great time. Although they were speaking some Asian language, from their laughters, I could tell they had lots of fun. In the mean while, Hand, Prada and Grace, each took a pen and started writing on a piece of napkin. That was part of the process. I, on the other hand, kept enjoying my wine.
The party ordered their food and booze. As they were eating and after some alcohol, they got a bit hyper and their voices got louder and louder. The sweater guy was the most talkative. His face got all red, apparently a cheap drinker. Sometimes, he would stand up to talk as if that was the only way to make himself heard.
After they had their food and just ordered their desserts. Hand said to me, "Let the show begin!"
I walked up to the table, wearing an angry look, and knocked on their table real hard. --Three times!
"Can't you guys lower your fxxking voice !?" I said loudly, staring at the sweater guy, then Yong Bao, then quickly the Kungfu master, and then the sweater guy again.
I must look really angry and scary. They all shut up, shocked, perhaps partly because of my voice and language and partly because of my mohawk and piercings.
The party all of sudden went dead silent.
Before any of them was able to respond, I added, "If I don't come up to make it fxxking clear, you motherfxxkers just wouldn't get it, would ya?"
I stood there, waiting for their response. They were all looking at me, speechless.
After one, two, three, four seconds, the Kungfu master started, "We are … solly... vely vely solly... We will lower our voices." He said nicely and politely, with that funny accent. That put me at ease. Whoo!
The sweater guy stood up and said to me, "Yes, sorry, we are very sorry. We will keep our voice low."
I turned my back without acknowledging them, and went back to my seat.
"How did I do?" I asked the gang.
"Good job, good job!" they all said, cheerfully. They passed me their napkins. "Read these!" Hand said. And they each got another napkin and started writing again.
The other table indeed became much quieter. In fact, instead of speaking, they were nearly whispering. But since they were so close to us, we could still hear their voices.
"Here you go. " Hand passed me another napkin. "This is what the sweater guy just said. And, buddy, round two!"
- 注册
- 2011-06-13
- 消息
- 171
- 荣誉分数
- 30
- 声望点数
- 0
I read the napkin and went up to the long table again, with the same angry face.
"Are you dissin' me?" I grab the sweater of the sweater guy and shouted, as if I was going to beat him up. I know how to be scary, I really do. The negro slang "diss" was chosen intentionally to make an impact.
"What?" The sweater man immediately got panic and punked out.
"I SAID, ARE YOU DISSIN' ME?" I repeated, "and WHY ARE YOU DISSIN' ME?!" I was acting so real that I started feeling some real anger in me.
Every one at the table looked nervous and worried.
"What … did you mean?" The sweater guy asked carefully.
Before I was going to give him shit again, a waiter came up, "what is the problem here?"
I let go the sweater guy and turned to the waiter. "He insulted me. No, actually he insulted us!"
"No, I didn't". Seeing the waiter coming, the sweater guy looked slightly relieved.
"Yes, you did!" I said angrily, "Didn't you just say 'white people are weirdos'?!"
"I … didn't…" He again got nervous, perhaps also feeling surprised how I would know.
"You sure you didn't say that?" I challenged him while trying my best to speak with some decency. Well, the waiter is here, it is necessary to pretend.
"No, I did not." The sweater guy somehow put himself together and spoke rather calmly.
"You are lying! You think I don't understand Chinese? Didn't some of you early on say that two of your friends did not show up? Didn't THAT girl, over there," I pointed to the skinny student-looking girl, "say that you will make your friends each drink up a whole bottle of wine when they show up in your next party? Didn't YOU say that you would take the two bottles of peppers that THAT lady, over there," I pointed to the neatly dressed lady,"brought for one of your friends? AND, after I asked you to lower your voice just now, didn't YOU say to your friends, right here, a minute ago, that WHITE PEOPLE ARE WIERDOS?!" This train of words came out so smoothly that I myself got surprised, and actually, as well, proud.
The party were all looking at me astonished, couldn't believe that I understood Chinese. Of course, that was from what the gang wrote on the napkins, and, in fact, I could not remember more than what I just said.
My attack was clearly successful. The sweater guy, obviously believing that I understood Chinese, got immediately defeated.
"I … I …" He stuttered, "I... did say that."
"So, isn't that an insult, to most of people here in this restaurant?" I was fast reasoning and compiling my sentences, "and to most of the people in this country?!" -- I was good! Told ya.
"Well, " the waiter said peacefully, "I think that is more than an insult. It is discrimination. It is a racist statement."
"Yes! Yes!" I was so glad that the waiter stood on my side, which was a complete surprise. "That is the word! It is discrimination! It is racist! Very racist!" I repeated what the waiter gave me and quickly built on it, "You are … very bad! very f… bad! … despicable! Like the Nazies!" I almost had the f-word popped out.
"Are you dissin' me?" I grab the sweater of the sweater guy and shouted, as if I was going to beat him up. I know how to be scary, I really do. The negro slang "diss" was chosen intentionally to make an impact.
"What?" The sweater man immediately got panic and punked out.
"I SAID, ARE YOU DISSIN' ME?" I repeated, "and WHY ARE YOU DISSIN' ME?!" I was acting so real that I started feeling some real anger in me.
Every one at the table looked nervous and worried.
"What … did you mean?" The sweater guy asked carefully.
Before I was going to give him shit again, a waiter came up, "what is the problem here?"
I let go the sweater guy and turned to the waiter. "He insulted me. No, actually he insulted us!"
"No, I didn't". Seeing the waiter coming, the sweater guy looked slightly relieved.
"Yes, you did!" I said angrily, "Didn't you just say 'white people are weirdos'?!"
"I … didn't…" He again got nervous, perhaps also feeling surprised how I would know.
"You sure you didn't say that?" I challenged him while trying my best to speak with some decency. Well, the waiter is here, it is necessary to pretend.
"No, I did not." The sweater guy somehow put himself together and spoke rather calmly.
"You are lying! You think I don't understand Chinese? Didn't some of you early on say that two of your friends did not show up? Didn't THAT girl, over there," I pointed to the skinny student-looking girl, "say that you will make your friends each drink up a whole bottle of wine when they show up in your next party? Didn't YOU say that you would take the two bottles of peppers that THAT lady, over there," I pointed to the neatly dressed lady,"brought for one of your friends? AND, after I asked you to lower your voice just now, didn't YOU say to your friends, right here, a minute ago, that WHITE PEOPLE ARE WIERDOS?!" This train of words came out so smoothly that I myself got surprised, and actually, as well, proud.
The party were all looking at me astonished, couldn't believe that I understood Chinese. Of course, that was from what the gang wrote on the napkins, and, in fact, I could not remember more than what I just said.
My attack was clearly successful. The sweater guy, obviously believing that I understood Chinese, got immediately defeated.
"I … I …" He stuttered, "I... did say that."
"So, isn't that an insult, to most of people here in this restaurant?" I was fast reasoning and compiling my sentences, "and to most of the people in this country?!" -- I was good! Told ya.
"Well, " the waiter said peacefully, "I think that is more than an insult. It is discrimination. It is a racist statement."
"Yes! Yes!" I was so glad that the waiter stood on my side, which was a complete surprise. "That is the word! It is discrimination! It is racist! Very racist!" I repeated what the waiter gave me and quickly built on it, "You are … very bad! very f… bad! … despicable! Like the Nazies!" I almost had the f-word popped out.
- 注册
- 2011-03-16
- 消息
- 1,200
- 荣誉分数
- 240
- 声望点数
- 173
"I … I …" The sweater guy must be feeling like hell.
"He did not mean that every white man is a weirdo. He was just talking about you." The student-looking girl started arguing, trying to help his friend.
"Yes," the sweater man seemed to find a light of hope and quickly defended, "I did not refer to every white man, I was only saying you are a w…" but before he completed his sentence, that light must have disappeared, and he stopped.
"So, you mean I am a wierdo?" Of course I would pick up on this.
"… …" the sweater man lost his words. Poor man, I started feeling sympathetic for him.
"So, why am I a wierdo?! "but my job was not done, I must continue. "which part of me is weird?!"
"Your hair!" the girl said firmly. She got to be dumb, or somehow got turned into a dumb by university education or something. For a second I was actually glad that I didn't go to college.
"So what is wrong with my hair?" I asked girl, slightly softer. I don't yell at girls usually.
"It is weird!" The girl was very sure.
"That would be a personal insult." The waiter commented. "This is a country of freedom. Every one is free to have his hair done the way he wants."
"But …" the girl's face turned red, "…. most people wouldn't have their hair done like that …"
"Minority deserves respect too." The waiter answered.
Now I started to suspect that this waiter was also hired by Hand.
"Yes, this is a horrible insult!" I added. "This is a free country, you must respect my hair!" Well, this sentence is a bit lame; after i said it, I myself realized it. But, it was ok, I got my point right.
At this moment, Yong Bao stood up. He said, with confidence and calm, "We are sorry that some of us had used some inappropriate words. I would like to apologize for that."
That was smart. Now it became difficult for me to continue. When some one is nice to you, it is really hard to attack. As my brain was fast spinning, trying to figure out my next move, the waiter said, "Yes, I think you should apologize to this gentleman."
Wow, he calls me gentleman. This was the first time I've ever been called like this.
"… Yes, I apologize" the sweater guy said. After all, he was smart enough to eventually figure out what was the best thing to do.
But, too bad, buddy. I got my next move.
"He did not mean that every white man is a weirdo. He was just talking about you." The student-looking girl started arguing, trying to help his friend.
"Yes," the sweater man seemed to find a light of hope and quickly defended, "I did not refer to every white man, I was only saying you are a w…" but before he completed his sentence, that light must have disappeared, and he stopped.
"So, you mean I am a wierdo?" Of course I would pick up on this.
"… …" the sweater man lost his words. Poor man, I started feeling sympathetic for him.
"So, why am I a wierdo?! "but my job was not done, I must continue. "which part of me is weird?!"
"Your hair!" the girl said firmly. She got to be dumb, or somehow got turned into a dumb by university education or something. For a second I was actually glad that I didn't go to college.
"So what is wrong with my hair?" I asked girl, slightly softer. I don't yell at girls usually.
"It is weird!" The girl was very sure.
"That would be a personal insult." The waiter commented. "This is a country of freedom. Every one is free to have his hair done the way he wants."
"But …" the girl's face turned red, "…. most people wouldn't have their hair done like that …"
"Minority deserves respect too." The waiter answered.
Now I started to suspect that this waiter was also hired by Hand.
"Yes, this is a horrible insult!" I added. "This is a free country, you must respect my hair!" Well, this sentence is a bit lame; after i said it, I myself realized it. But, it was ok, I got my point right.
At this moment, Yong Bao stood up. He said, with confidence and calm, "We are sorry that some of us had used some inappropriate words. I would like to apologize for that."
That was smart. Now it became difficult for me to continue. When some one is nice to you, it is really hard to attack. As my brain was fast spinning, trying to figure out my next move, the waiter said, "Yes, I think you should apologize to this gentleman."
Wow, he calls me gentleman. This was the first time I've ever been called like this.
"… Yes, I apologize" the sweater guy said. After all, he was smart enough to eventually figure out what was the best thing to do.
But, too bad, buddy. I got my next move.
- 注册
- 2011-03-16
- 消息
- 1,200
- 荣誉分数
- 240
- 声望点数
- 173
"Apologize? You think an apology is enough?!" I started my attack again, "You know today is Christmas Eve? You know this is an expensive restaurant? You know I wouldn't come here today if it were not for Christmas? I came here tonight, spending big bucks and hoping to have some fun with friends. But you guys over there were making this loud noise this whole time, you think that is not disturbing?! Then you discriminated me in public, and you insulted me in public, and you think I could still have fun at all?! You think your apology will get back my appetite to the food I just had?! You think your apology will get back my time spent sitting there pissed off? You think your apology will get back the money that I am paying for this horrible night?!" Following this line of thoughts, I was going to ask the guy to pay for our meal, but I stopped, since I wasn't sure if this was what Hand wanted.
"I …" the sweater man could not defend himself.
"How about we buying you a drink?" This was Yong Bao talking.
"Now we are talking! See, that is the right attitude! I like this man！ " I said to the sweater guy as I pointed to Yong Bao. "But I don't want a drink, that wouldn't make me happy." I made up my mind asking for something different.
"Then, what can we do to make up for you?" Yong Bao asked nicely.
"This is none of your business " I said to Yong Bao, "I only want THIS man, " I pointed to the sweater guy, "who discriminated me and insulted me, to make up for me."
"I guess I could discuss this with you on his behalf." Yong Bao said.
"Yes, he could. He is my friend." The sweater guy quickly clutched at his last straw.
"OK. I want two things. First, I want him to give me the two bottles of pepper that he will get from that lady." I remembered that on one of the napkins, Hand asked me to get the pepper, "as Christmas gift." I added.
"That was for another friend." the sweater guy said.
"But you said you would take it since the friend did not show up."
"I was just joking." The sweater guy felt uncomfortable giving me the pepper.
Yong Bao and other people in the party looked real confused and could not understand why I would ask for the pepper.
"OK, take the pepper." The neatly dressed lady said, and passed me the pepper. She then said to the sweater guy, "let's just get over with this. I could make more pepper for Hand."
"Thanks. You know I really love pepper. This would make a good christmas present for me." I said, taking over the peppers.
I believe that all of them, at this moment, were thinking that I was a real weirdo.
"The next thing I want, is to be entertained." I continued, "by this man."
"What?" I guess I was too creative for the sweater guy's imagination.
"Yes, I want you to entertain me, to make me happy." I confirmed.
"What do you want him to do?" Yong Bao spoke up again.
"Nothing too difficult. Since he discriminated me and insulted me, I want him to entertain me. That is all." I said.
"What exactly you want him to do?" Yong Bao asked.
"I want him to sing a song for me." I said.
Yong Bao looked surprised. Speechless for a couple of seconds, he suddenly bursted into laughters, "I think, that's actually a good idea!"
Every one else in the party started to loosen up and laughed. The student-looking girl actually got cheered up, "Go, Xian Ge, Go!"
"But this has to be a song that I name, and he has to sing loudly and PERFORM for me." I added, to increase the complexity.
"I can not sing or perform." The sweater man tried to back off.
"Yes, you can!" The party all seemed to like the idea that the sweater man sing a song.
"OK, this song, by this very tall and skinny woman, it goes like this …" I recollected the song and hummed the beginning part of the tune.
"I know that song!" The girl immediately recognized the tune. "It is by Celine Dion. It is called … 'the power of love'…. I think."
"Here you go. I want this man to sing and perform this song for me."
"Yes, Xian Ge!" the party all loved this idea. "You can do it!", "Come on!", " Go, Xian Ge!".
"Here is the lyrics". The girl passed on her iPhone to the sweater man.
"… OK … OK …" The sweater man saw this was the only way out. "Let me try..."
"You have to be loud. Otherwise I wouldn't be happy and your friends wouldn't be happy, and you have to do it again."
"The whispers …in the morning…" the guy began, looking at the lyrics as he sang, "Of lovers …. sleeping tight …"
"Louder!" I said.
"Are rolling …. like thunder now … as I look in your eyes …"
"PERFORM!, Look at my eyes! Come on, Look at my eyes! " I pushed.
The guy threw a quick look at me and then looked down at the lyrics again.
"I hold on … to your body …"
"PERFORM! Hold my arm! Come on! Come on! Hold my arm!"
"And feel …. each move you make …" He put his hand on my arm."Your voice is warm …. and tender … " As he was singing, he became much more relaxed. "A love that I could not forsake …"
"Good Job! Louder! Louder!" I kept directing his performance.
"Cause I am your lady--- " All of a sudden, he became really loud and seemed no longer to care about anything, "and you are my man …"
Now he was indeed performing. He gave me that affectionate look like a gay guy in love with me; he grabbed my arm like a feminine lover.
Every one was completely amused by his funny postures and could not help laughing out loudly.
=============================
Reference: The Power of Love, By Celine Dion
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BHoj8uFdr8"]Celine Dion The Power Of Love Lyrics - YouTube[/ame]
"I …" the sweater man could not defend himself.
"How about we buying you a drink?" This was Yong Bao talking.
"Now we are talking! See, that is the right attitude! I like this man！ " I said to the sweater guy as I pointed to Yong Bao. "But I don't want a drink, that wouldn't make me happy." I made up my mind asking for something different.
"Then, what can we do to make up for you?" Yong Bao asked nicely.
"This is none of your business " I said to Yong Bao, "I only want THIS man, " I pointed to the sweater guy, "who discriminated me and insulted me, to make up for me."
"I guess I could discuss this with you on his behalf." Yong Bao said.
"Yes, he could. He is my friend." The sweater guy quickly clutched at his last straw.
"OK. I want two things. First, I want him to give me the two bottles of pepper that he will get from that lady." I remembered that on one of the napkins, Hand asked me to get the pepper, "as Christmas gift." I added.
"That was for another friend." the sweater guy said.
"But you said you would take it since the friend did not show up."
"I was just joking." The sweater guy felt uncomfortable giving me the pepper.
Yong Bao and other people in the party looked real confused and could not understand why I would ask for the pepper.
"OK, take the pepper." The neatly dressed lady said, and passed me the pepper. She then said to the sweater guy, "let's just get over with this. I could make more pepper for Hand."
"Thanks. You know I really love pepper. This would make a good christmas present for me." I said, taking over the peppers.
I believe that all of them, at this moment, were thinking that I was a real weirdo.
"The next thing I want, is to be entertained." I continued, "by this man."
"What?" I guess I was too creative for the sweater guy's imagination.
"Yes, I want you to entertain me, to make me happy." I confirmed.
"What do you want him to do?" Yong Bao spoke up again.
"Nothing too difficult. Since he discriminated me and insulted me, I want him to entertain me. That is all." I said.
"What exactly you want him to do?" Yong Bao asked.
"I want him to sing a song for me." I said.
Yong Bao looked surprised. Speechless for a couple of seconds, he suddenly bursted into laughters, "I think, that's actually a good idea!"
Every one else in the party started to loosen up and laughed. The student-looking girl actually got cheered up, "Go, Xian Ge, Go!"
"But this has to be a song that I name, and he has to sing loudly and PERFORM for me." I added, to increase the complexity.
"I can not sing or perform." The sweater man tried to back off.
"Yes, you can!" The party all seemed to like the idea that the sweater man sing a song.
"OK, this song, by this very tall and skinny woman, it goes like this …" I recollected the song and hummed the beginning part of the tune.
"I know that song!" The girl immediately recognized the tune. "It is by Celine Dion. It is called … 'the power of love'…. I think."
"Here you go. I want this man to sing and perform this song for me."
"Yes, Xian Ge!" the party all loved this idea. "You can do it!", "Come on!", " Go, Xian Ge!".
"Here is the lyrics". The girl passed on her iPhone to the sweater man.
"… OK … OK …" The sweater man saw this was the only way out. "Let me try..."
"You have to be loud. Otherwise I wouldn't be happy and your friends wouldn't be happy, and you have to do it again."
"The whispers …in the morning…" the guy began, looking at the lyrics as he sang, "Of lovers …. sleeping tight …"
"Louder!" I said.
"Are rolling …. like thunder now … as I look in your eyes …"
"PERFORM!, Look at my eyes! Come on, Look at my eyes! " I pushed.
The guy threw a quick look at me and then looked down at the lyrics again.
"I hold on … to your body …"
"PERFORM! Hold my arm! Come on! Come on! Hold my arm!"
"And feel …. each move you make …" He put his hand on my arm."Your voice is warm …. and tender … " As he was singing, he became much more relaxed. "A love that I could not forsake …"
"Good Job! Louder! Louder!" I kept directing his performance.
"Cause I am your lady--- " All of a sudden, he became really loud and seemed no longer to care about anything, "and you are my man …"
Now he was indeed performing. He gave me that affectionate look like a gay guy in love with me; he grabbed my arm like a feminine lover.
Every one was completely amused by his funny postures and could not help laughing out loudly.
=============================
Reference: The Power of Love, By Celine Dion
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BHoj8uFdr8"]Celine Dion The Power Of Love Lyrics - YouTube[/ame]
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